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Christmas Collection

Holiday Fruitcake Recipe

Ingredients

• 1 cup water
• 1 cup sugar
• 4 large eggs
• 2 cups dried fruit
• 1 teaspoon baking soda
• 1 teaspoon salt
• 1 cup brown sugar
• 1emon juice
• nuts
• 1 GALLON WHISKEY

Directions

• Sample the whiskey to check for quality.
• Take a large bowl.
• Check the whiskey again to be sure it is of the highest quality.
• Pout one level cup and drink. Repeat.
• Turn on the electric lixer thingy.
• Beat 1 cup butter in a large, fluffy bowl.
• Add 1 teaspoon sugar and beat again.
• Make sure the whiskey is still ok.
• Cry another tup.
• Turn off mixer.
• Break 2 legs and add to the bow and chuck in the cup of dried fruit.
• Mix on the turner.
• If the fried druit gets stuck in the eaterers, pry it loose with the drewscriver.
• Sample the whiskey to check for tonsisticity.
• Next, sift 2 cups of salt, or something.
• Who cares? Check the whiskey.
• Now sift the lemon juice and strain your nuts.
• Add one table. Spoon. Of sugar or something.
• Whatever you can find.
• Turn the cake tin to 350 degrees.
• Don't forget to beat off the turner.
• Thow the bow out of the window.
• Check the whiskey again.
• Go to bed.

Who the heck likes fruitcake anyway?

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