Jokes Today

One liners for todays world

• My sister's talent for talking to her plants is being put to the test today. She's trying to explain to them about the broiling temperatures outside.
  
  

• Well, it's finally happened. A new reality show. Boy meets girl; boy loses girl; boy gets operation and becomes girl.
  
  
• With the new school year looming ahead, I figured by the time my son enters his second childhood, I should have just about paid for the first.
  
  
• You know the juvenile gang problem has gotten out of hand when you see gun shops running "back to school" specials.
  
  
• I tell ya, Iraq is tough. The most popular form of transportation there these days is a stretcher!
  
  
• It's pre-season training for football and one football coach has a great system to find out who the toughest newcomer is. He assigns all the rookies the same locker.
  
  
• One team got a real tough rookie this year. In his senior year at college, he won a demolition derby and didn't even have a car!
  
  
• Spent a week this summer at an old resort. I mean old! The rats wore powered wigs.
  
  
• Yeah, electric cars may help, but they won't solve the smog problem until they invent an electric dog!
  
  
• My best friend took a birth control pill and a fertility pill at the same time and gave birth to a very reluctant baby.
  
  

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