Jokes Today

'Twas the night of Thanksgiving

'Twas the night of Thanksgiving,
But I just couldn't sleep
I tried counting backwards,
I tried counting sheep.

The leftovers beckoned
The dark meat and white
But I fought the temptation
With all of my might

Tossing and turning
With anticipation
The thought of a snack
Became infatuation.

So, I raced to the kitchen,
Flung open the door
And gazed at the fridge,
Full of goodies galore.

I gobbled up turkey
And buttered potatoes,
Pickles and carrots,
Beans and tomatoes.

I felt myself swelling
So plump and so round,
'Til all of a sudden, I
Rose off the ground.

I crashed through the ceiling,
Floating into the sky
With a mouthful of pudding
And a handful of pie.

But, I managed to yell
As I soared past the trees
Happy eating to all --
Pass the cranberries, please.

May your stuffing be tasty,
May your turkey be plump.
May your potatoes 'n gravy
Have nary a lump,

May your yams be delicious.
May your pies take the prize
May your Thanksgiving dinner
Stay off of your thighs.

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