Jokes Today

Cops When You Need Them

A man and his wife are awakened by some prowlers. The man is careful not to turn on any lights, peeks out of the bedroom window and sees two guys stealing lumber, cement, tools, and other equipment from his garage.

He calls 911 and speaking softly, reports the ongoing burglary.

He's connected with the local police department but is told that unfortunately, it's change of shift time and no officers are available immediately.

As he sees his belongings being loaded on a truck, he gets a better idea.

He calls again and says, "Never mind hurrying. I just shot both guys."

Within two minutes, three squad cars show up with red lights on and sirens blaring. The burglars are caught red-handed.

Soon the sergeant approaches the man and asks, "Are you the one that made the 911 calls?"

"Yes I am."

"I thought you said you shot both guys."

The man says, "I thought you said no one was available."

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