Jokes Today

Remember Burma Shave

Those Grand Old Burma Shave Road Signs

• TRAINS DON'T WANDER
  ALL OVER THE MAP
  'CAUSE NOBODY SITS
  IN THE ENGINEER'S LAP
  Burma Shave
  
  
• SHE KISSED THE HAIRBRUSH
  BY MISTAKE
  SHE THOUGHT IT WAS
  HER HUSBAND JAKE
  Burma Shave
  
  
• DON'T LOSE YOUR HEAD
  TO GAIN A MINUTE
  YOU NEED YOUR HEAD
  YOUR BRAINS ARE IN IT
  Burma Shave
  
  
• DROVE TOO LONG
  DRIVER SNOOZING
  WHAT HAPPENED NEXT
  IS NOT AMUSING
  Burma Shave
  
  
• BROTHER SPEEDER
  LET'S REHEARSE
  ALL TOGETHER
  GOOD MORNING, NURSE
  Burma Shave
  
  
• CAUTIOUS RIDER
  TO HER RECKLESS DEAR
  LET'S HAVE LESS BULL
  AND MORE STEER
  Burma Shave
  
  
• SPEED WAS HIGH
  WEATHER W AS HOT
  TIRES WERE THIN
  X MARKS THE SPOT
  Burma Shave
  
  
• THE MIDNIGHT RIDE
  OF PAUL FOR BEER
  LED TO A WARMER
  HEMISPHERE
  Burma Shave
  
  
• AROUND THE CURVE
  LICKETY-SPLIT
  BEAUTIFUL CAR
  WASN'T IT?
  Burma Shave
  
  
• NO MATTER THE PRICE
  NO MATTER HOW NEW
  THE BEST SAFETY DEVICE
  IN THE CAR IS YOU
  Burma Shave
  
  
• A GUY WHO DRIVES
  A CAR WIDE OPEN
  IS NOT THINKIN'
  HE'S JUST HOPIN'
  Burma Shave
  
  
• AT INTERSECTIONS
  LOOK EACH WAY
  A HARP SOUNDS NICE
  BUT IT'S HARD TO PLAY
  Burma Shave
  
  
• BOTH HANDS ON THE WHEEL
  EYES ON THE ROAD
  THAT'S THE SKILLFUL
  DRIVER'S CODE
  Burma Shave
  
  
• THE ONE WHO DRIVES
  WHEN HE'S BEEN DRINKING
  DEPENDS ON YOU
  TO DO HIS THINKING
  Burma Shave
  
  
• CAR IN DITCH
  DRIVER IN TREE
  THE MOON WAS FULL
  AND SO WAS HE.
  Burma Shave
  
  
• And my all time favorite:
  
  PASSING SCHOOL ZONE
  TAKE IT SLOW
  LET OUR LITTLE
  SHAVERS GROW
  Burma Shave
  
  
• Do these bring back any old memories?
  If not, you're merely a child.
  If they do - then you're old as dirt... ?????????LIKE ME! ?
  
  and I remember:
  
  
• Don't stick your elbow
  Out so far
  It may go home
  In another car.
  BURMA SHAVE
  
  

 

 

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