"ONE NIGHT," said Uncle Remus - taking
Miss Sally's little boy on his knee, and stroking the child's hair
thoughtfully and caressingly - "one night Brer Possum call by fer Brer Coon,
'cordin' ter 'greement, en atter gobblin' up a dish er fried greens en
smokin' a seegyar, dey rambled fort' fer ter see how de balance er de
settlement wuz gittin' 'long. Brer Coon, he wuz one er deze yer natchul
pacers, en he racked 'long same ez Mars John's bay pony, en Brer Possum he
went in a han'-gallup; en dey got over heap er groun', mon. Brer Possum, he
got his belly full er 'simmons, en Brer Coon, he scoop up a 'bunnunce er
frogs en tadpoles. Dey amble 'long, dey did, des ez sociable ez a basket ere
kittens, twel bimeby dey hear Mr. Dog talkin' ter hisse'f way off in de
woods.
" 'Spozen he runs up on us, Brer Possum, w'at you gwine ter do?' sez Brer
Coon, sezee. Brer Possum sorter laugh 'round de cornders un his mouf.
" 'Oh, ef he come, Brer Coon, I'm gwine ter stan' by you,' sez Brer
Possum. 'W'at you gwine ter do' sezee.
" 'Who? me?' sez Brer Coon. 'Ef he run up onter me, I lay I give 'im one
twis',' sezee."
"Did the dog come?" asked the little boy.
"Go 'way, hone!" responded the old man, in an impressive tone. "Go way!
Mr. Dog, he come en he come a zoonin'. En he ain't wait fer ter say howdy,
nudder. He des sail inter de two un urm. De ve'y fus pas he make Brer Possum
fetch a grin fum year ter year, en keel over like he wuz dead. Den Mr. Dog,
he sail inter Brer Coon, en right dar's whar he drap his money purse, kaze
Brer Coon wuz cut out fer dat kinder bizness, en he fa'rly wipe up de face
er de yeth wid 'im. You better b'lieve dat w'en Mr. Dog got a chance to make
hisse'f skace he tuck it, en w'at der wuz lef' un him went skaddlin' thoo de
woods like hit wuz shot out'n a muskit. En Brer Coon, he sorter lick his
cloze inter shape en rack off, en Brer Possum, he lay dar like he wuz dead,
twel bimeby he raise up sorter keerful like, en w'en he fin' de coas' cle'r
he scramble up en scamper off like sumpin' was atter 'im."
Here Uncle Remus paused long enough to pick up a live coal of fire in his
fingers, transfer it to the palm of his hand, and thence to his clay pipe,
which he had been fillling - a proceeding that was viewed by the little boy
with undisguised admiration. The old man then proceeded:
"Nex' time Brer Possum met Brer Coon, Brer Coon 'fuse ter 'spon' ter his
howdy, en dis make Brer Possum feel mighty bad, seein' ez how dey useter
make so many 'scurshuns tergedder.
" 'W'at make you ho' yo head so high, Brer Coon?" sez Brer Possum,
sezee.
" 'I ain't runnin' wid cowerds deze days,' sez Brer Coon. 'W'en I wants
you I'll sen fer you,' sezee.
"Den Brer Possum git mighty mad.
" 'Who's enny cowerd?' sezee.
" 'You is," sez Brer Coon, 'dat's who. I ain't so-shatin' wid dem w'at
lays down on de groun' en plays dead w'en dar's a free fight gwine on,'
sezee.
"Den Brer Possum grin en laugh fit to kill hisse'f.
" 'Lor', Brer Coon, you don't speck I done dat kaze I wuz 'feard, duz
you?' sezee. 'W'y I want no mo 'feard den you is dis minnit. W'at wuz dey
fer ter be skeerd un?' sezee. 'I know'd you'd git away wid Mr. Dog ef I
didn't, en I des lay dar watchin' you shake him, waitin' fer ter put in w'en
de time come,' sezee.
"Brer Coon tu'n up his nose.
" 'Dat's a mighty likely tale,' sezeee, 'w'en Mr. Dog ain't mo'n tech you
'fo' you keel over, en lay dar stiff,' sezee.
"'Dat's des w'at I wuz gwineter tell you 'bout; sez Brer Possum, sezee.
'I want no mo' skeer'd dan you is right now, en' I wuz fixin' fer ter give
Mr. Dog a sample er my jaw,' sezee, 'but I'm de most ticklish chap w'at you
ever laid eyes on, en no sooner did Mr. Dog put his nose down yer 'mong my
ribs dan I got ter laughin', en I laughed twel I ain't had no use er my
lim's,' sezee, 'en it's a mussy unto Mr. Dog dat I wuz ticklish, kaze a
little mo' en I'd e't 'im up,' sezee. 'I don't mine fightin', Brer Coon, no
mo' dan you duz,' sezee, 'but I declar' ter grashus ef I kin stan' ficklin'.
Git me in a row whar dey ain't no ticklin' 'lowed, en I'm your man,
sezee.
"En down ter dis day" - continued Uncle Remus, watching the smoke from
his pipe curl upward over the little boy's head - "down ter dis day, Brer
Possum's boudn ter s'render w'en you tech him in de short ribs, en he'll
laugh ef he knows he's gwine ter be smashed fer it."