The BALL REPORTS

California Girls, then and Now Politically Correct

July 26, 2006

1965 version of the song by Beach Boys

Well, east coast girls are hip I really dig the styles they wear.

And the Southern girls with the way they talk, they knock me out when I'm down there.

The Midwest farmers' daughters really make me feel all right.

And the northern girls with the way they kiss, they keep their boyfriends warm at night

I wish they all could be California girls.

2006 politically correct version

Women on the east coast are socially aware I greatly admire their dress sense.

And women south of the Mason-Dixon line, Because of their idiosyncratic speech patterns, Leave me incredulous whenever I visit.

Those women born to land owners and tillers Imbue in me a wonderful sense of well being.

And young women residing in northern states, With the singular manner of their intimate facial contact, Help young males of their acquaintance maintain appropriate Body temperatures when persistent evening chills threaten, Social mores notwithstanding.

In my opinion, they would all make excellent residents of California.

Commentary

1965 just felt a whole lot better before every loser suddenly cried "I am better then you are, I demand more from you." "Politically Correct" is not more equal, it is reverse discrimination against those who did not start out to discriminate, but NOW I Do Discriminate against all of you lessor's. You want more then I have, You deserve NO MORE!

Guest Reporter

Ron Wingate

Prior | Tell us what you think | Next

Add to Your Social Bookmarks: Del.icio.us Digg Furl Reddit Simpy Spurl Y! MyWeb - Netscape - StumbleUpon StumbleUpon